Self-esteem is really how you view yourself, value yourself and treat yourself.
It is natural in life to have both strengths and weaknesses but if we have low self-esteem we do not feel it is OK to have this humanness. We perceive our vulnerabilities as being flaws and failings.
How we behave around these ‘flaws’ can vary.
For example, we can hold back from our own life, our own choices, and our own contribution out of a fear of it not being good enough. This can bring us to a place of being over involved in the lives of others while doing very little to explore or attain our own goals.
We may feel a huge risk in showing the truth about ourselves or revealing ourselves fully. We can give up on situations and remain in a pattern of self-pity and victimhood. We can hold on too tightly to situations because to let go may leave us with the discomfort of having to walk our own path!
We can focus on perfectionism and over-compensate to hide anything that we perceive as being not good enough. We can become critical and controlling of others and situations, putting others down to inflate our own positive view of self.
In order to come out of this mode of relating, we firstly must become aware of our unhelpful thoughts and behaviours, how we are naturally reacting to situations. I like to call this our factory settings, our default way of relating.
Once we know this about ourselves, we can then learn how to slow our responses down so that we can choose more helpful ways of relating.
These choices lead to change.
Would you like to treat yourself with more support, encouragement, kindness and patience?
Would you like to approach life with an attitude of growth and optimism rather than feeling driven by fear?
Would you like to feel self-acceptance rather than constant self-doubt?
Now, would you like to learn more about how to achieve this change?
Join me at my free webinar on self-esteem to gain more awareness and make better choices for you!